Please Dell, Don't Hurt Em

I LOVE the BAGLES over the BLACKBIRDS!
How sucky is it that NFL network owns this game? I can't watch it. This is gonna be a great game. Shouldn't somebody file suit against NFL network ala Microsoft for screwing everybody?

I LOVE the EWES over the CARDS!
I's hard to love anything about the Rams right now.

I LOVE the SKINS over the DIRTY BIRDS!
... and Michael Vick is the filthiest Bird of them all. We want SHAUB!

I LOVE THE PATES over the MOTORCITYKITYS!
Does this game even need to be played? Just imagine that you play for the Lions and get hurt in this game. Is there any honor in saying that you were giving your best effort against the Pats? Seriously, just take a kick to the nuts and the loss and start contemplating Brady Quinn or Troy Smith, or any number of slow overrated recievers.

I LOVE the CULTS over the TEETS!
Inside every decent human being is compasion for Albert Hainsworth. Admit it, we've all wanted to mercelously stomp with cleats on the face of our fellow man. Perhaps that "man" respresents our anger, bitterness, adiction, upbringing, and all that holds us back. Perhaps it also represents a Penis.

I LOVE the CHEFS over the POOPSTAINS

I LOVE the BERS over the PURP!
Where is all this "watch out, the Vikes might surprise em" talk coming from? Have these people been watching the Vikings at all? They can't score, and Grossman will pass for 800 yards if he sees the kind of pass rush the Purp have shown as of late.

I LOVE the J.E.T.S. over the PUCKERS!
Go Rotator Cuff!

I LOVE the BOLTS over BARFALO!
Bolts are dang good, and Lars, you said so from the beginning. You were right and we all doubted. Lars, a gotta know.... 5 years from now, who wins the superbowl? Please say the Texans or the Browns or the Lions. Please.

I LOVE the AINTS over the CRUSTY PROSPECTORS!
49ers are decent..... But Brees is dang good. How did he suck so bad for 3 years and thn just turn it on? Theres no way to explain it.

I LOVE the RAYDUHS over the COWSKULLS!
Can't believe I'm picking Art Shells Boobs for a win, but they havn't won in a while and the Texans suck butt on the road, even if the black hole has become about as scary as the ball pit at McDonalds.

I LOVE the PHINS over the JAGS!
The Jags are tanking just about as bad Michael Richards career right about now.

I LOVE the BROKEBACKS ove the GENTS!
Ditto for the Gents.

I LOVE the GAY TACONITE ORE PROCESSORS over the TAMPONS!
Why am I still optimistic about the steelers? They suck. No way a team can get so bad for no reason.

I LOVE the BACOS over the SHAWKS!
This might as well be do or die for the Broncos, and now Cutler has his chance. That D should be able to contain Shawn Alexander.

I LOVE the PANTS over the UGLIES!
I Love any team playing opposite Jeff Garcia! By the way, I think he bags groceries at the Rainbow off University.