Stupid Thursday night games

Here's the picks:

Cin over Balt - Chad Johnson brings back the Icky shuffle. Ravens can't beat that.

Ind over Ten - Because it worked last week, the Titans spot the Colts a large, early lead. Titans quickly realize that the Colts aren't the Giants, and Peyton is not Eli.

Ariz over StL - Rams repeatedly ask Larry Fitzgerald for his autograph because he used to get rides home from The Peter Williams.

Min over Chi - Bears feel the league should just give them this game. None of the players or coaches show up. Eager fans suit up and actually beat the Vikings but to no avail.

NYJ over GB - To show just how talented he is, Favre decides to throw left handed. Proving his point, he is able to play the same and throws rocket interceptions throughout the game.

NO over SF - Fans are asked to name five 49ers. No one can.

Buf over SD - Chargers think the apocolypse is happening due to the inclement Buffalo weather.

KC over Clev - In an effort to show grace, Herm Edwards has the Chief defense not to take the field at the end of the game. The Browns offense runs to the wrong end zone.

Wash over Atl - Thinking it will improve his passer rating, Michael Vick decides to run past his receivers and lateral back to them.

NE over Det - Feeling the cut off sweatshirt is still too restrictive, Belichick dons a wife beater.

Mia over Jax - Scientific evidence is published prooving that Daunte Culpepper truly is dumber than a box of rocks.

Oak over Hou - John Shoop's new high-powered offense lulls the Texans to sleep.

TB over Pit - After the game, fans are given the opportunity to make goofy faces to try and make Cowher and Gruden laugh.

Dal over NYG - In addition to becoming a top quarterback and dating Jessica Simpson, Tony Romo admits that because of the shape of his ears, like Dumbo, he can fly.

Sea over Den - Shanahan gets confused by his own running back by committee and unintentionally puts them all on the inactive list.

Phi over Car - Realizing that they only have one offensive option, the Eagles run all of their plays through Bryan Westbrook.